You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize