so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
