why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Randomize