last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
