Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
