i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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