For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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