Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You have to summon your inner elephant
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
