at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
nut hugger
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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