Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
