I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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