So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
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