you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
