yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
