Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I think I have vodka in my lungs
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
