hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
