i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
