do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
she woke up with a sticky ear
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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