I like my sex mixed with concussions.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
