That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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