I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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