He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Less talking, more tequila
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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