why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
