When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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