My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
