Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
