i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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