sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
