I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize