the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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