I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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