the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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