Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
