Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
