soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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