We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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