you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
