He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
