perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
