Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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