dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
