drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
