Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
she pinky promised me she was 18
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
