I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
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