seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
