i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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