wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
you told grandpa to call you daddy
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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