So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
im holly from the hills drunk
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
