is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
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