what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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